At long last, Here is the New Back log quotes...

Enjoy!


::It's a concept that sounds as mad as trying to cram bats into a toaster oven in an attempt to understand why gang violence occurs. That's probably the most idiotic thing I've written, so you know how mad it is::

::I'm going mad .... I'm sitting in a porn theatre at picadilly circus, talking to my dead best friend, about how I should kill myself because I'm a werewolf::

::Your toast has been burned, and no amount of scrapping will remove the black part::

::Now I am thinking about kittens .... kittens covered in spikes .... that makes me angry::

::ok, this has gone from weird to kind of gross, to a serious health risk ... lets get out of here::

::You got to feed and feed the hick ups until they mature into liver failure::

::Side affects include wine, women and song::

::Oh my God, our Commander in Thief is making the troops torture Iraqi babies until they bleed oil for Halliburton!::

::You Will Need: Unfrosted glass light bulb (100 watt GE Brightlight suggested), 24 glass pipettes, a funnel, a towel, non-spermicidal water based lubricant, antibiotic gel, a 60 pound sledge hammer or a friend with boots, smooth-surface dildo or vibrator, tweezers.::

::Dear Lord, Lead me not into temptation ... unless she is cute and horney::

::Evil Shrink-e-dinks!::

::Remember that day that you became an evil, power-hungry warlord with a bizarre ring fetish?::

::Its like trying to walk around inside a giant fat kid::

::With all the grace of a three penised Leprechaun::

::If a trained monkey could do it, and you just showed me, then what does that make you?::

::You don't have to do it that way, but you don't have to work here either. While you do though, you do what I say::

::Guess what Armor my pants are::

::Remember, we don't go home until the last girl gets pregnant::

::Bank of America ... We turn your money into millions of crapy signs::

::That's the funniest thing I've ever seen since my faucet blew::

::Its not how you suck, but what you suck that matters::

::Well, if an alien rips its way out of her chest cavity, then you will know that something is amiss::

::Anything is possible when it involves cans::

::And I was worried I was bothering people with the freaking cannon toilet::

::I'm sorry, that was supposed to be a cartoon reference, not an insult::

::Better a Kerry Sticker in back than a Bush in front::