Dear Valued customer,

We here at Chris Inc. appreciate the opinions of you, the customer. For this reason we have been working hard, round the clock to improve a new image for the Chris™ of the future. We admit progress has been slow, but the steps toward a quality product have been obvious. As you may have noticed, the addition of a "attention grabbing lower face warmer" as well as a "personality upgrade to improve attitude and agressiveness towards others". These improvements are minor, but still represent the first steps toward the next model.
In the future expect new Chris™ models to come equipt with more permenent jelled hair and sun glasses, as well as software upgrades to "out-going-ness", "fashion sence" and "common sence". A new proceser is in the works to make Chris™ of the future more usable in real time conversations, as well as comprehension of new data.
Though we have been working long hours for your benefit, there are still several problems that are too big to tackle in the near future. The first of these is the "Gullable bug", that was ignored in early models and has managed to cause major problems in reacent months. Also, unfortunately many different forms of spell checkers have proven incompatable with any previous models, even though it has been in the works for about eight years.
We appreciate your input towards future Chris™ models and hope you take the time to forward your thoughts/opinions using the information included with this message. We wish you a very great day, and hope that together we can make the future a better place through Chris™.

Sincerely,
Chris Inc. General manager and founder
Rarunyahr Helcefea